Badass Profile Tweaks
Top 25 Users
Top 25 MSGs
So far I've submitted
away messages, and they've been used a total of
times. Here are my messages...
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||¸.-···· 0(o.o)0.··-., ||
||\¸.-···-· O--O··· -.¸..\
|| \ Sleeping \
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If homework is work, when do i get paid?... Gone to find out!
HEY REF! CHECK YOUR ANSWERING MACHINE... YOU MISSED A LOT OF CALLS!
A couple was going out for the evening. They'd gotten ready, all dolled-up, dog put out, etc. The taxi arrives and as they start out, the dog shoots back into the house. They don't want the dog shut in, so the wife goes out to the taxi while the husband goes upstairs to chase the dog out. The wife, not wanting it known that the house will be empty explains to the taxi driver, "He's just going upstairs to say good-bye to my mother."
A few minutes later, the husband gets into the cab. "Sorry I took so long" he says. "Stupid bitch was hiding under the bed and I had to poke her with a coat hanger to get her to come out! Then I had to wrap her in a blanket to keep her from scratching and biting me as I hauled her arse downstairs and tossed her out in the back yard! She better not sh*t in the vegetable garden again!"
The silence in the cab was deafening.
Are you a sergeant? Cuz you made my private stand. ;-)
Family Guy Away Messages
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