away messages that dont suck
Home

Top 25 Users

Top 25 MSGs

Buddy Icons

Help

kate28

So far I've submitted 121 away messages, and they've been used a total of 168345 times. Here are my messages...

by: kate28 (07/13/2009)

Today, we salute you,
Mr. Push Up Bra Inventor.
Never before has one man done so much with so little.
(lift'em up higher)
From mosquito bites,
Pimples,
And pancakes,
To melons,
Mountains,
And major league yabbos,
An engineering feat so brilliant,
It can only be described as va va va voom!
(va va voom)
Thanks to you,
Even a ninety year old grandmother
can go from A to double D in a single bound.
(What's your number granny?)
So crack open an ice cold Bud Light, Oh Hoister of the Hooter,
Because when it comes to the bust, You're the best.
(Thank you, Thank you, Thank you)
We Salute You
1398 Clicks

by: kate28 (07/01/2009)

Today we salute you,
Mr. Pickled Pigs Feet Eater.
Ignoring all you know about pigs,
And where they live,
And what they step in,
You look at their pickled paws and say "yummy".
(lookin' tasty)
Craving only the most daring meal,
You pass up the cow tongue,
Skate by the head cheese,
Dismiss the rocky mountain oysters.
(rocky mountain oysters)
But a pigs foot soaked in pickle juice?
Now that's good eatin'.
(save me a big one)
So crack open an ice cold Bud Light, Mr. Pickled Pigs Feet Eater,
Cause it takes guts to eat those feet.
We Salute You
1391 Clicks

by: kate28 (07/01/2009)

Today we salute you,
Mr. Supermarket Produce Puter-Outer.
You have perhaps the greates job known to man:
Squeezing giant melons all day long.
(looove those squishy melons)
When women come in looking for squash, you say,
"Perhaps I can interest you in my giant zucchini."
(that ain't no zucchini)
Day in and day out,
Women step on your grapes,
And you don't even flinch.
(OOOOOOH)
Is that a banana in your pocket?
No.
It's a plantain.
(muy muy grande)
So crack open an ice cold Bud Light, Oh King of the Cumquats.
Because if one guy has to fondle our plums,
We're glad it's you.
We Salute You
1349 Clicks

by: kate28 (06/15/2009)

Today we salute you,
Mr. Next Day Carpet Installer.
Because when we are jonesing for carpet,
We're jonesing for it...
Right now.
(Totally jonesing)
Thanks to you,
We have absolutely no problem buying carpet,
Over the phone,
Sight unseen.
(Just pick up the phone)
A near miracle,
An entire basement -
Wall to wall shag in less time than it takes to order a pizza.
(I love pepperoni)
Your motto:
"If your a payin', I'm a layin'."
(oh yeah!)
So crack open an ice cold Bud Light, King of the Carpet Men,
You not only go the distance for us,
You do it wearing knee pads.
We Salute You
1368 Clicks

by: kate28 (06/15/2009)

Today we salute you,
Mr. Office Party Over-Hugger.
Tonight's your big night to let your hugs linger just a little too long
(squeeze you like Charmin)
Right through the little pat on the back,
One Mississippi.
Two Mississippi.
Three Mississippi.
Okay that's long enough there Hugh Hefner,
Time to come up for air.
(can you feel me baby? you're no playboy)
So crack open an ice cold Bud Light, Copper of the Quick Feel,
Because you just put the ASS
In harassment suit.
We Salute You
1399 Clicks

Pages: 12345678910111213141516171819202122232425
Family Guy Away Messages



Art/Pix
Babysitting
Bathroom
Celebs
Chuck Norris
Drinking
Eating
Emo/Real Life
Funny
Gaming
Geek
General
Girly
Homework/Study
Inspirational
Jokes
Laundry
Love
Mean
Naughty
Other/Random
Partying
Phone
Political
School/Class
Shopping
Shower
Sleeping
Sports
TV/Movies
We Salute You
Work

CGI Inc. 2009
Privacy Policy

Advertise Ops
Free Horoscopes