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Browsing Chuck Norris...
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by: Schlady (04/11/2006)

Chuck Norris was the fourth Wiseman. He brought baby Jesus the gift of "beard". Jesus wore it proudly to his dying day. The other Wisemen, jealous of Jesus' obvious gift favoritism, used their combined influence to have Chuck omitted from the Bible. Shortly after, all three died of roundhouse kick related deaths.
Chuck Norris
1,279 Clicks

by: Bladvak (04/11/2006)

Chuck Norris can lead a horse to water AND make it drink.
Chuck Norris
1,236 Clicks

by: cheetahbabe85 (04/11/2006)

If Chuck Norris is late, time better slow the f#ck down.
Chuck Norris
1,236 Clicks

by: cheetahbabe85 (04/11/2006)

Chuck Norris, Vin Diesel and Arnold Schwarzenegger have all died and are in Heaven. Each of them hope to occupy the seat next to God. God asks Vin Diesel why he thinks he should have the seat and Vin replies, "I believe... I should have the seat because of the virtuosity in my toughness and pride." Arnie says, "I believe... that I should be the one sitting next to you because of all my achievements." God then turns to Chuck Norris, who replies with, "I believe... you are sitting in my seat."
Chuck Norris
1,298 Clicks

by: Djman (04/11/2006)

BUD LIGHT PRESENTS: Real Men of Genius.
Today we salute you, Mr. Chuck Norris!
(Mister Chuck Norris!)
You know really how to deliver a round-house kick to all those villains.
(Ouch! Why you gotta kick so hard!)
You stand above the rest, MC Hammer can't touch you.
(Cant Touch Norris!)
Karate your eye Chuck, all you need is a round-house kick, a body bag, and a Bud Light.
(Chuck don't hurt me!)
So sit on down on your pile of bodies, Chuck, and crack open a nice Bud Light. Cheers.
(Mister Chuck Norris!)
Chuck Norris
1,292 Clicks

by: futballplaya989 (04/11/2006)

Every time you tell a Chuck Norris joke, Chuck Norris stares a cute kitten to death. Please, stop telling Chuck Norris jokes. DO IT FOR THE KITTENS!
Chuck Norris
1,252 Clicks

by: Totalmentalcase (04/07/2006)

How To Piss Nerds Off: Tell 'em Chuck Norris sucks.
Chuck Norris
1,260 Clicks

by: abento123 (03/27/2006)

One time in an airport a guy accidently called Chuck Norris "Chick Norris". He explained it was an honest mistake and apologized profusely. Chuck accepted his apology and politley signed an autograph. Nine months later, the guy's wife gave birth to a bearded baby. The guy knew exactly what had happened, and blames nobody but himself.
Chuck Norris
1,249 Clicks

by: happykid7 (03/27/2006)

Chuck Norris does not use spell check. If he happens to misspell a word, Oxford will simply change the actual spelling of it.
Chuck Norris
1,246 Clicks

by: JesseO8 (03/26/2006)

If you ask Chuck Norris what time it is, he always says, "two seconds 'til." After you ask, "Two seconds 'til what?" he roundhouse kicks you in the face.
Chuck Norris
1,236 Clicks


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