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by: bored2death (10/08/2007)

How much wood would a wood-chuck chuck if a wood-chuck could chuck wood?
.... 5, ya u heard me! 5
Other/Random
1,300 Clicks

by: zaqsaw (10/08/2007)

2,000 years ago one man got nailed to a tree for saying how great it would be if everyone was nice to each other for a change.
-Douglas Adams
Other/Random
1,301 Clicks

by: hudsonthehockeyfreak (10/08/2007)

I don't know where I am either
Other/Random
1,300 Clicks

by: Borda (10/04/2007)

You know, gone buddy really sucks! Ive submitted HUBDREDS of messages and they havent accepted any of them! I mean..... wait a minute.... they're reading this now, they wont accept it! NOW ILL NEVER GET MY POINT ACROSS!!!!
Other/Random
1,300 Clicks

by: theYeahSandwich (09/30/2007)

BRB: Be Right Back. Implies that you are off to complete a simple task such as going to the bathroom, or taking out the trash. Should take no longer than 5 minutes.

BBS: Be Back Soon. implies that you are off to complete a slightly more time-consuming task, such as cleaning the dishes or running next door to borrow a cup of sugar. Takes more than 5 mins but less than 10.

BBL: Be Back Later. You are off to complete a task which you know is going to seriously inhibit or distract you from conversation. These tasks include going to the movies, devoting hours of your day to revamping your MySpace page without interruption, or doind what sounds like a simple task at first but you know it's probably going to take longer than 10 minutes, or even hours.

Under NO circumstances is it acceptable to lead on an online friend by saying "BRB" in a situation that you KNOW is a "BBL" occassion. The person on the other computer, in their naivety, takes the time to remember the conversation in hopes that you really will "BRB."

If you don't plan on coming back until the time of day has officially changed (Morning to Afternoon, Afternoon to Evening, etc) then for goodness sakes, just say "bye" or "ttyl." That way, if you come back earlier than expected, you have at least presently surprised the person on the other side.
Other/Random
1,300 Clicks

by: Jakers748 (09/20/2007)

You know what really pisses me off? Modern art. I mean seriously people, it's just so damned stupid. On the internet the other day I saw a news article about a woman who made modern art by putting a bunch of light bulbs in a room and flicking them on and off. She got famous real fast! A retarded chipmunk on crack could make modern art! Hey look everyone, I just took a sh*t in the toilet, I call it brown on blue! Now I'm a famous jerk who got rich off modern art too!
Other/Random
1,300 Clicks

by: flipmyflow (09/20/2007)

Flying fast through the night till the orange of morning light.
Other/Random
1,300 Clicks

by: littlemunchy (09/19/2007)

My wood shop teacher once wore a shirt that said "got wood?"

I don't get it.
Other/Random
1,300 Clicks

by: RandomTask (09/10/2007)

My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE - "If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning!"

My mother taught me RELIGION - "You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL - "If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"

My mother taught me LOGIC - "Because I said so, that's why."

My Mother taught me more LOGIC - "If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."

My mother taught me FORESIGHT - "Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."

My mother taught me IRONY - "Keep crying and I'll give you something to cry about."

My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS - "Shut your mouth and eat your supper!"

My mother taught me about CONTORTIONIST - "Will you "look" at the dirt on the back of your neck!"

My mother taught me about STAMINA - "You'll sit there 'till all that spinach is finished."

My mother taught me about WEATHER - "It looks as if a tornado swept through your room."

My mother taught me how to solve PHYSICS PROBLEMS - "If I yelled because I saw a meteor coming toward you; would you listen THEN?"

My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY - "If I've told you once, I've told you a million times - Don't Exaggerate!!!"

My mother taught me THE CIRCLE OF LIFE - "I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."

My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION - "Stop acting like your father!"

My mother taught me about ENVY - "There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do!"

My Mother taught me about ANTICIPATION - "Just wait until we get home."

My Mother taught me about RECEIVING - "You are going to get it when we get home!"

My Mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE - "If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that way."

My Mother taught me to THINK AHEAD - "If you don't pass your spelling test, you'll never get a good job."

My Mother taught me ESP - "Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you're cold?"

My mother taught me HUMOR - "When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me."

My mother taught me how to BECOME AN ADULT - "If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

My Mother taught me about GENETICS - "You're just like your father."

My Mother taught me about my ROOTS - "Do you think you were born in a barn?"

My Mother taught me about WISDOM OF AGE - "When you get to be my age, you will understand."
Other/Random
1,302 Clicks

by: zaqsaw (09/02/2007)

Away with some Oompa Loompas
I don't know what they're doing to me...
But I think I'm a virgin again O.o
Other/Random
1,300 Clicks


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