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10 Most Annoying Things Parents Say:
Q: What college do you wanna go to?
-College?! Surviving elementary school was hard enough! How the hell should I know?!
Q: What do you wanna be when you grow up?
-Umm, I dunno, It's 1 in the afternoon, I just woke up; can't I get some alone time to play video games?
Q: If all your friends jumped off a cliff, would you jump too?
-Hell effin Yea I would!
Q: What did you do in school today?
-Its school, what the hell do you think I was doing? Sleeping!
Q: Did you finish your homework?
-Trust me, "my dog ate it" just doesn't cut it when your talking to your own parent.
Q: What were you doing alone in your room with your girlfriend?
-Studying the human anatomy, now leave us alone! She's giving me another practice test. :D
Q: Who said you can do that?!
-The lil demon on my shoulder >.>
Q: Does every thing I tell you go in one ear and out the other?
-*light breeze whisshes by*
Q: Do I look like a maid to you?!
- Believe me, you look nothing like the maids I've seen online.
Q: Who Killed Roger Rabbit?!
-Sorry, thats before my time; the only rabbit I know is the Energizer Bunny; he just keeps going... and going.
THINGS TO DO AT A BORING MOVIE
1. Wear a top hat.
2. Throw popcorn in the air and yell, "It's snowing"
3. Go, "Oooooh..." whenever anyone kisses.
4. Clap when the good guy gets killed.
5. Make a noise like your passing gas and go, "Ahhh..."
6. Starting wheezing and ask the person next to you if you can have some Juicy Fruits for you asthma.
7. During the previews, yell, "Can you fast-forward it?"
8. Whenever the badguy is doing something devoius, say, "Watch out"
9. Laugh very loudly at all the corny jokes.
10. Tell the man selling popcorn that the girls bathroom is flooding.
11. Yell out what is going to happen.
12. Tell the man next to you that you have diarrhea and wink while smiling.
13. Wear a cape and when its your turn to get popcorn yell, "I'm Batman Hahaha" and run away.
14. Yell, "Fire" and moon the people coming through the exit.
15. When peolple sit next to you star crying and scream "NOOOOO! You killed *insert random name here*!!!" and don't stop yelling "MURDERER!" until they move.
16. Yell outloud, "Stop molesting me"
*M12 Warthog Light Reconnaissance Vehicle w/damage repairs + gun turret ammunition: $750,000
*SPARTAN II MJOLINR Battle Armour: $1.25 million
*M9 HE-DP Grenades, M6D Pistol w/ ammunition, MA5B Assault Rifle w/ ammunition, M90 Shotgun w/ ammunition, S2 AM Sniper Rifle w/ ammunition, M19 SSM Rocket Launcher w/ ammunition and a gun permit to use them all: $2.75 million
*Using all of the above to wipe out an entire Covenant army...while having fun doing it: PRICELESS
There are just some things money can't buy, and for those things there's MasterCard. Assisting you in your military expenses from 1995 all the way to 2552.
Waaah! Obama is related to Dick Cheney?!!!
So if Barack Obama is part white, does that mean Hilary Clinton is part man o.O
Today we salute you,
Mr. Backyard Bug Zapper Inventor.
Not content to harmlessly repel insects with lotion,
You discovered a way to fry them with electricity until their bodies explode.
Ah the sounds of summer:
The blood-curdling scream of a moth having 700 volts of electricity shooting through its body.
(music to my ears)
Every night a magical explosion of exoskeleton and insect goo that can only mean one thing:
So crack open an ice cold Bud Light, Mr. June Bug Blaster,
Then sit back, and watch the fireworks.
Simpsons Away Messages
We Salute You
© CGI Inc. 2009